Introspection is an activity that every coach – whatever kind they may be – must undertake regularly. It can be nourished with feedback, with collective extrospection. Every two weeks at beNext we have what’s called “dead poets day”, more prosaically: coaches’ day. During these days everyone wants to learn, wants to progress. We alternate between a holacracy/sociocracy format¹ with supervision, or presentations. We often hunt down things left unsaid to guarantee the group’s good health. This summer we were able to hold two collective extrospection sessions. We constantly need feedback from others about ourselves, especially if they’re peers. About our behaviors, whatever they may be. The group is benevolent and mature enough, so it’s possible.

You need to know how to make things left unsaid disappear.

You need to know how to tell each other things.

We want to nourish everyone’s introspection.

The Radical Board

The “radical board” spontaneously emerged during these days by mixing a give and take matrix with the idea of radical candor.

From RACI to needs

In the beginning was RACI. A dry list in the form of a matrix of responsibilities and different levels of culpability. With RACI everyone builds their citadel and we forget the intermediate spaces. Everyone describes their turf, and gaps form between groups.

Then came “Give and Take” in which we describe interactions between groups through a matrix. This cross-table between groups intelligently replaces RACI (too rigid, too fossilized in its way of thinking). “I give you this and I take this from you”. Giving, taking, we build dynamics, but these verbs remain a bit jarring, cutting. We’re still somewhat in bartering, in negotiation.

Gradually, well-intentioned people transformed “Give and take” into “I need…” (for me it was Dragos who showed me this). Still a matrix, but each group indicates what it expects, what it hopes for, from another. Gaps no longer form, they become visible and therefore call to be filled.

In the image above, the business development team, the lawyers’ team, the accounting team, the tax team, and finally the treasury team indicate what each needs by designating the group from which they imagine it could come. Here the context was the acquisition of an event space. In the example, the Legal team indicates that it expects four elements from the business development team. We’ll realize that only two are actually delivered by them. We’ll find the solution to fill the gap.

Radical Candor

Do you remember that TED on “radical candor”? OK it was long, laborious, in a word, boring. But it supported an interesting idea: being radically frank, brutally honest, in your feedback to people. Implied is a frankness without judgment, a direct frankness that spares a thousand circumlocutions, and that radically gives your feeling, your opinion. It’s also a book, I believe, but I haven’t read it.

We were able to repurpose the “I need” from the matrix mentioned above, into “I’d like more of this from you” or “you should know how to hear this (but you do what you want with it)” but with the spirit of this radical candor. We are benevolent and mature, we can tell each other things that can nourish each of our introspections and help us improve.

It became very interesting when the different points of view we received from other coaches…converged.

The Strengths Cards

Last week we chose another collective extrospection format. Alexandre (also called “The grizzly”, also called “the dentist”, also called “beautiful praline”, it’s curious how mean people are) had brought his “strengths cards” game.

Like an extreme quotation workshop, we silently and collectively chose three strength cards designating the qualities of one of us in turn. In silence, unless a dilemma really persisted (then we talk and vote). If someone brings a fourth strength, they must remove one. When it stabilizes, we get a result.

It’s always amusing to witness what emerges for oneself. Naturally we couldn’t help but also discuss each person’s areas for improvement, the strengths to work on. I’ll share the results, the other coaches are OK with it.

Strengths

In order of passage, with the coaches present.

Strengths to Work On

In order of passage, with the coaches present.

This allowed me to nourish my introspection.

This allowed me to clear up things left unsaid.

This allowed me to tell my colleagues things in an intelligent way.